Just a Handful of Adventures

Well it's been forever since I've written on this thing.  It feels like a lot has happened, but in retrospect, not too much really has.  Just a handful of adventures.

Adventures with Anna:

1. BJ's Bayou.  Enough said.

2. With just an hour until my class started, we decided to go on a Quest for Milkshakes in Ashton, Idaho.  Ashton is 20 minutes away, so we had to speed.  Well it turned out the place I went to years ago that served the best milkshakes in the world was now closed.  So we went to the Ashton grocery store where I had a faint recollection of dangerously huge ice cream cones.  Just entering that place was an adventure.  It was the filthiest, most run-down grocery store I'd ever seen, with a lady working at the deli who looked like a zombie and was dishing up mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop.  Anna was quick to point out the mystery fuzz growing out of the wall behind her.  Well, I had to know if this was the place with huge ice cream cones, so I ordered a double just to see what would happen.  I was disappointed.  It was a lot, but not nearly as much as it used to be.  Then Anna informed me that she didn't want any! How was I supposed to speed back to class in now snowy conditions with this enormous ice cream cone?  So I pushed the top scoop off into the dirt next to the store.  It was "Moose Tracks."  In the dirt it looked like a big poo.  And then as I tried to eat the rest of it on the way back it dripped and left all these little moose tracks on my crotch.  And then I stepped into my combo class with the last half of the cone in my hand saying, "Sorry I'm late, I had an emergency... (everyone looked at the cone) ...date.  An emergency date."  Luckily the whole combo was a bunch of guys and they were all like, "It's cool man.  We understand."

3. Getting kicked out of the St. Anthony's Veteran Memorial Park by the police.

Adventures with Liz:

Liz and I decided to go on a Denny's run last Sunday at midnight, with the help of the Baxter soundtrack, Brazilian drum circle music, and New Orleans street funk played way too loud.  I had the most amazing French toast I've had in a long time.  The Guitar Hero Super Star (see three posts ago) was there with a guy when we walked in and still there when we left.  Apparently Denny's is the place to have long cuddle sessions.  And then we got to listen to the 18+ couple sitting behind us on what sounded like a first date, and the guy was explaining the details of the short stint he'd served in jail.  She sounded impressed.  And as I was thinking how bizarre the midnight Denny's crowd was, I caught myself dressing up my water glass with my napkin and licking my lip incessantly because of its strong mysterious tangy flavor, and it occurred to me that I was not actually an exception.

Adventures with Kurt:

1. I got pulled over TWICE a couple weeks ago.  (Sorry Mom, I didn't tell you about the second time.)  The first time I was in the car with Wilson and Kurt on our way to a rehearsal in IF.  It was funny because I've been in Wilson's car when he's been pulled over like three times.  He told me to tell the cop that he was distracting me, which I didn't because it totally wasn't true.  The second time was two days later with Kurt and Kevin coming back from the premier of the Wolverine movie at like 2:00am.  Both times I got off with a warning because I was "straight forward and honest with them."  And there's a lesson to be learned from this: warnings don't get recorded!  The second cop totally would have given me a ticket had he known that I'd been pulled over on the same road just two days before.  Oh yeah, and be honest and stuff.

2. The next week Kurt and I went to the Southeast Idaho Jazz Society jam session at the Cellar in IF.  I went the speed limit.  Unfortunately the jam was pretty lame.  Nice folks though.

3. Kurt and I drove to Salt Lake on the 12th to play at Sarah's 27th birthday party.  Brandon cummings happened to be our drummer, which was an awesome surprise, and the bassist was really good too.  A lot of people showed up, and Brandon led a toast to Sarah, whom he had just met.  Afterward we went to TGIF's where Kurt ordered a lemonade with some kick.  We all took a sip, and the vanilla flavor was very strong.  Upon further examination of the drink description on the menu, we discovered it was because of the vanilla vodka.  Ok, actually we all took a sip AFTER we discovered that, but that's beside the point.  We had met up with Emily who's going on her mission to Brazil soon and she took the TINIEST sip, like only wetting her lips, and pretty soon she was like, "Guys, I think I'm getting a headache."  We left Salt Lake for Rexburg at 11:30pm because Kurt had to work at 7:00am, so we blasted music the whole way so Emily and I could stay awake while Kurt attempted to get what sleep he could.  It was fun though.

Adventures with Rexburg's Underground Jazz Alliance:

So for the past few weeks Melinda (the graduate vocalist we use on gigs a lot), Kurt, and I have been planning Main Street Jazz, a weekly jazz club-type event.  It's been Melinda's pet project because her husband has a top position at APX Alarms, and the APX building is empty all summer.  Because it has tables, chairs, a bar, Love Sacs, big open room, lots of windows, and on Main Street, and because APX said we could use it for free, it's the perfect place for something like that.  Melinda has done most of the work figuring out the logistics of it all and buying all the materials while Kurt and I have mostly been in charge of the music and advertising, but the three of us are every day bouncing ideas off each other and working out the kinks.  We spent all last Monday evening setting up and getting the lighting just right using white Christmas lights and paper lanterns from the dollar store.  Melinda had found a former bartender to work the bar, so we had all this stuff to make all these fancy fruity mixed drinks.  Everything looked awesome.

Our first show was last Wednesday (May 13) and it was a huge success.  We didn't actually think many people would show up, so when we set up for like 60 people we were afraid there would be a lot of empty chairs.  We were surprised and frankly a little panicked when 115 people showed up.  Melinda's husband was scrambling all over setting up more chairs and hauling up all these couches from all these little rooms downstairs.  There was a constant line to the bar because we said the first drink was free for opening night.  But it was awesome and we had nothing but good feedback.  The band was me, Ryan on trumpet, Aaron on bass, Kurt on keys, and Derek on drums.  Good band.  And Jay Lawrence even showed up and sat in on a few tunes.  Melinda, who had been really worried because she'd spent way more than she had budgeted, made most of her money back that night.  She was so happy she paid the whole band and the bartender even though most of us had agreed to do it for free.

We spent a long time tearing everything down that night because that was the agreement with APX, but the next morning when they found out how successful it was, they told us to leave everything up.  Really?  You couldn't have told us that before?  But now we get to do it all over again next week, and I'm really excited.  Hopefully it's not like, everyone went last week so now no one is planning on it this week.  But I was checking on our posters around town today and the waiters at Gringo's said lots of customers have been talking about it and all the waiters were planning on going too.  Fingers crossed!

This is what I accomplished this weekend.

So I was going to go camping, but then I decided not to, but then Sarah persuaded me to, but then it got cancelled, but then Ashley could go with us so then it was back on again, so I drove down to Salt Lake on Thursday, and then we decided not to go camping.

So what did we do?  Pretty much nothing except go to Keys on Main Friday night which is a dueling pianos bar downtown.  We wrote down our three top song requests for them to choose from and they played MINE, which of course was Girls Just Want to Have Fun.  And I had a virgin margarita that was tasty.

All last week I was trying to schedule something with this girl Andrea from Boise that I ran into at a Latin dance a few weeks ago when she was visiting Rexburg.  We had mutual crushes years ago but hadn't seen one another in a really long time.  She's been in Orem all week trying to get this really competitive writing position, so after a couple failed attempts at scheduling a date, I finally was able to take her out to breakfast this morning.  We made a big styrofoamcup/straw/plasticfork/napkin sculpture thing and dedicated it to the waitress who came up and told us how cool it was, and then had a nice long conversation sitting on wet grass, but our situations are not exactly conducive to getting to know one another at this point since our lives are both pretty much in limbo right now.

The rest of the day was spent sleeping, saxophoning, eating Indian food, learning how to play the ukulele for two hours, risking my and Sarah's lives for the sake of art (as seen above), and watching the Lost Skeleton.

All in all, just about as productive as any other day of my life right now.

Just flying by the seat of my butt... or the pants of my seat... or... my pants have... wings... what?

Life has been nutty lately.  I can't go to grad school because I gots no monies, so I'm trying to figure out if I'm going to be in Provo, Boise, or stuck in Rexburg next year.  My vote is NOT stuck in Rexburg.  Whatever the case, I need to be taking sax lessons from someone in order to improve my skillz, so either Ray Smith in Provo, Sandon in Boise, or Brent in Twin Falls.  But whatever the case, I'm going to be in Rexburg all summer trying not to be in it.

My love life can be summed up in the following two music videos, Ben Harper being my mature response to my situation and Radiohead being my immature response.  Both responses help me get through it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVXFP89EeqU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeowFbvpu0U

Basically she said she didn't want me, acted like she really did want me, I gambled and finally professed my undying love, oops I should have done that three months ago, her true soul mate showed up over the weekend in Baxter-like fashion, my heart kicked me in the groin, and now I'm off to buy me a gromwell and start afresh.  BUT I shouldn't make too light of the situation in that I think it was an important growing experience for the both of us and it's never a waste to have made a great friend.

Last night I hung out with Sara Z for the last time ever possibly.  It was nice to have finally become friends again after a year of weirdness.  In other girl news, I very randomly met someone last Wednesday on my last day of school with whom I'm definitely going to travel the world and overcome world hunger (or, um, maybe just watch a lot of foreign films), but first she really wants to take me to BJ's Bayou and introduce me to the ghost in the green dress.

Funny story that sounds awfully arrogant coming from me but is still funny: Last Thursday Emily and I were Googling our names and my name popped up on a blog entitled "You know you're a music major when..." where several BYU-I vocal major girls had listed their ideas.  One of them said that you know you're a music major when at least five of your friends have had a crush on me at some point or another.  I laughed and left a facetious comment but then erased it because I didn't want to seem like TOO much of a jerk.  Plus some of these girls had been my students in the past so... probably not a great idea.  Oh, and that was my last night seeing Em before she leaves on her mission.  It's definitely been an emotional week of "goodbye, I may never see you again."

This week I'm going to take a vacation to Salt Lake and hang with Sarah for a few days.  It was supposed to be a camping trip, but that fell through, so now I'm just gonna camp at her place.  We'll probably get matching tattoos.  At any rate, it will be nice to escape.  Sarah's a genius by the way.  BOTH the U of U and BYU child development programs have figured out a way to work with her for her masters because they both really liked her, although officially she'll be enrolled at BYU.  She's so popular.

Well the next time I write I hope to know what I'm actually doing with my life in the upcoming year!

Tales from the Crypt

It's time for my update of random events.  Ready GO!

1. Kyle made his senior recital poster with pictures of he and Aaron on it (Aaron is directing the orchestra).  Both of these guys are geeks.  Everyone know that.  They know that.  Talented geeks, but geeks nonetheless.  And they both spend way too much time trying to impress the ladies by coming off as these attractive, professional, intense musicians.  Kyle wanted his poster to send that message of course, so both he and Aaron are staring at you dead serious with these really intense resolute looks.  Well of course no one was taking the poster seriously.  Aaron was holding his baton like he was Harry Potter about to defend himself with his wand, and as I stared at it more, I realized how much Kyle looked like professor Snape with short hair holding the neck of a cello.  So I spent a good two or three hours finding the perfect pictures on the internet to turn this poster into a Harry Potter movie advertisement.  Snape's head fit perfectly onto Kyle's and the cello neck turned into a broom.  For Aaron, I cut out just Harry's hair and glasses, both of which were slightly too small, giving it this really awkward geeky look.  Of course then I drew a lightning bolt on his forehead, and he already had the wand.  Then I taped it up on Kyle's locker.  It turned out really well if I may say so myself.  I wasn't there, but I heard it attracted quite a crowd, and I got compliments on it for the rest of the day.  Kyle hunted me down but he was a good sport about it and left it hanging on the inside of his locker.

 

2. So a little over a week ago we played a couple of days in the new dining area in the MC to advertise for the Wycliffe Gordon concert that weekend.  Well for like two weeks we'd been complaining and joking about how ridiculous the Wycliffe poster was that Center Stage designed because it had a picture of Wycliffe against a blue background with a yellow circle around his head, which was functioning as the "O" in GordOn.  So the message being conveyed was one of three things: 1. Wycliffe, your fat head is so round we thought it'd make a good "O"; 2. Wycliffe, your head is so round we thought we'd make it look like the moon; 3. Wycliffe, we admire you so much we decided to saint you and give you a big yellow halo.  In fact the first thing most people noticed was that it looked like he had a halo.

So anyway we were performing with one of those posters set up next to us and this girl comes up to me and says, "So what do you think about that poster?"  Without hesitation and without even thinking I turned to her and said very matter-of-factly, "Oh it's hideous."  She looked a little stunned and suddenly it dawned on me and I said, "Oh!  Are you the girl that designed them?"

Yup.  I talked to her for a minute and it turned out she had done her research and now I can see what vintage style she was going for, but it just turned out really awkward.  I apologized like a million times.

3. The Wycliffe concert was awesome.

4. I went to FHE for the first time in who-knows-how-long where they had a grand showing of The Incredibles in the cultural hall on a huge projector screen with popcorn and everything.  I'm finally making singles branch friends I can hang with, largely because my roommate is one of the integral members of that social scene.

5. I've been getting to know this girl Shanda who's a folk singer/guitarist/photographer/soccer player from California, so we started hanging out this week, mostly talking music and movies.  Her family is a bunch of intense movie buffs.

6. I've feel like I've become the cultural center of my singles branch because word got out that I'm into foreign flicks and now all these people have been borrowing my movies and watching them all week.  My Mongolian friend Roza watched The Color of Paradise from 2-4:00am last night and said she cried all the way through it, which is just kinda funny because she's one of the most happy, care-free people I know.

7. Thursday night Emily found me practicing and explained that she needed me to accompany her to a dance lab right then because her stalker was bound to be there.  We went, but it ended a lot sooner than she thought, so we got in a cha-cha-cha (FYI that's it's real name), fox trot, waltz and a couple of swings and it was over.  But we won some silly string for striking our best interpretive dance poses!  Then we made french toast at 10:00 at night with way too much nutmeg and it was scrumptious.

8. Last night we had a Vernal Equinox BBQ at Holly and Pili's place.  Somehow I got stuck grilling all the burgers and hotdogs.  I don't know how that happened.  It ended with Shanda and Pili doing several songs with the guitar.  They're both really pretty good.  Shanda had texted me that afternoon to announce the precise minute at which the vernal equinox was taking place.  I'm pretty sure I could feel it.  And it was fitting that it was the first day of spring because it was the first warm day we've had all year.

9. This morning Ryan, Shanda, Meagan, Roza and I went to the college flea market that some business students are doing for their project this semester.  It was actually really big with some pretty good booths, but it was apparent that several people were just using their booth as a garage sale.  Favorite parts: the booth selling a bunch of a used clothes and a bowling ball, the booth selling cats(?), the TWO booths selling flowery tutus, the booth selling edited movies including an edited version of a Hannah Montana video, and the random tire for sale that I didn't know which booth it belonged to.  Afterward we went ate lunch on the grass in the park in the SUN.

10.  Tonight I went to Guitars Unplugged at the last minute with Emily, and after we went to Ingrid's and ended up playing Guitar Hero which we were all really bad at.  Well then Ingrid's roommate comes in and I said I'd play against her and she looked at me like, "Whatever dude," sitting there chomping on her gum like it was cud and playing with her hair and staring at the ceiling and looking totally unimpressed with everyone.  And then she puts it on Expert mode which is LITERALLY almost impossible, and she starts playing and her fingers are FLYING and she's getting almost every note.  It was the craziest thing I've ever seen.  Her fingers were just a blur.  It's like she was this Guitar Hero prodigy.  As ridiculous as it sounds, and as much as I didn't want to admit it because she was being a brat, it was actually kind of inspiring.  Like, I don't think I'm even that coordinated on the sax.  The funny thing is I guess the game got her into actually picking up the the guitar a couple of years ago and Ingrid said she's really good at it now.

Because it chases away the loneliness birds.

To whom it may concern,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97BwLXtLTT0&NR=1

Waters of March

A stick, a stone,
It's the end of the road,
It's the rest of a stump,
It's a little alone

It's a sliver of glass,
It is life, it's the sun,
It is night, it is death,
It's a trap, it's a gun

The oak when it blooms,
A fox in the brush,
A knot in the wood,
The song of a thrush

The wood of the wind,
A cliff, a fall,
A scratch, a lump,
It is nothing at all

It's the wind blowing free,
It's the end of the slope,
It's a beam, it's a void,
It's a hunch, it's a hope

And the river bank talks
of the waters of March,
It's the end of the strain,
The joy in your heart

The foot, the ground,
The flesh and the bone,
The beat of the road,
A slingshot's stone

A fish, a flash,
A silvery glow,
A fight, a bet,
The range of a bow

The bed of the well,
The end of the line,
The dismay in the face,
It's a loss, it's a find

A spear, a spike,
A point, a nail,
A drip, a drop,
The end of the tale

A truckload of bricks
in the soft morning light,
The shot of a gun
in the dead of the night

A mile, a must,
A thrust, a bump,
It's a girl, it's a rhyme,
It's a cold, it's the mumps

The plan of the house,
The body in bed,
And the car that got stuck,
It's the mud, it's the mud

Afloat, adrift,
A flight, a wing,
A hawk, a quail,
The promise of spring

And the riverbank talks
of the waters of March,
It's the promise of life
It's the joy in your heart

A stick, a stone,
It's the end of the road
It's the rest of a stump,
It's a little alone

A snake, a stick,
It is John, it is Joe,
It's a thorn in your hand
and a cut in your toe

A point, a grain,
A bee, a bite,
A blink, a buzzard,
A sudden stroke of night

A pin, a needle,
A sting, a pain,
A snail, a riddle,
A wasp, a stain

A pass in the mountains,
A horse and a mule,
In the distance the shelves
rode three shadows of blue

And the riverbank talks
of the waters of March,
It's the promise of life
in your heart, in your heart

A stick, a stone,
The end of the road,
The rest of a stump,
A lonesome road

A sliver of glass,
A life, the sun,
A knife, a death,
The end of the run

And the riverbank talks
of the waters of March,
It's the end of all strain,
It's the joy in your heart.

Pixi Stix? JUST HOOK IT UP TO MY VEINS!!!!!!!

Hello word.  Here's the world.  Wait, flip that...   Illinois accepted me. Colorado did not.  I'm just waiting for my FAFSA pin number to FINALLY arrive so I can finalize that and find out if Illinois wants to offer me any money.  Cross your fingers.

Other than that life has been slowish: 

*I'm trying to practice a lot more.

*I think I've been grinding my teeth at night which is why my jaw hurts all the time.

*I leaned to one side of the toilet seat the other night and it snapped clear through and now it pinches really bad.

*I had to tell my stalker student to stop texting me for the second time.

*I saw a great Russian film by Andrei Tarkovsky called "Nostalghia," but if you're not into abstract artsy foreign films, I wouldn't recommend it. In fact I liked it so much I bought it.  It arrived in the mail today. There are several interesting themes in it, one of which is introduced by a crazy guy who's putting drops of oil into his hand and saying that when you put two drops together, you don't get two drops.  You just get a bigger drop.  And then they're walking through his house and there's this big sign on his wall that says 1+1=1.  Kind of a cool thought.  Oh, and then my friend Shanda referred to that scene in sacrament meeting last Sunday in a talk she had to give on marriage.  Actually there is a lot of Christian symbolism throughout the film.

*Speaking of films (but on the other end of the spectrum entirely) my roommate really likes High School Musical.  He threw a HSM birthday party for a girl he has a crush on in our ward the other day, and let me tell you, it was a big deal.  HSM pictures all over the walls, HSM decorations, HSM presents.  And he's been complaining about how much he wants to watch it lately, so finally he got a group of people together this evening for it.  I definitely wasn't interested, but he kind of guilt tripped me into thinking about it, and now we'll see.

OH WAIT OH WAIT OH WAIT!!!!!!!!  My roommate and friends just showed up HERE with the movie, and Ryan just stood in front of the TV and gave a very lengthy and eloquent introduction to High School Musical that was actually really funny.  And now the movie has been going for five minutes and I haven't stopped laughing.  Wow.  That's all I have to say.  In Ryan's words, it's like being fed Pixi Stix intravenously for an hour and a half...

Audition #2:

Very hip school.  Beautiful campus.  Terribly worn-down facilities.  The jazz department is crammed into a small corner of what looks like a cathedral.  The undergrad department is still fairly new so they only have a handful of undergrads, which means most of their jazzers are killer grad students.  I don't think I impressed anyone with my playing, but everyone was very cool.  John Gunderson the sax guy seemed fairly impressed by my teaching, maybe because he's so new to teaching and frankly isn't much of an educator yet, although he's a killer player and very personable.  I went to his advanced jazz theory class and it was hilarious.  We spent 15 minutes going over a graphic analysis of a Bjork (That's right, Bjork) song that he did.  It was a piece of paper that read from left to right, full of all these symbols he came up with to represent the different sounds.  "So right here there's this pointalistic texture going on, so I drew a bunch of dots, and this jagged line is for that jagged electronic thing going on right there."  And he doesn't really break things down because I don't think he thinks that way (the exact opposite of Dr. Watkins).  He just throws stuff out there and then sits there like he doesn't know what else to say, and people might take the opportunity to comment, or they might not.  "So man, check out those first three chords..." (long silence). Or, "So I think if I wrote a tune like this where the melodic phrases didn't line up with the harmonic phrases and they were all odd lengths, that'd be pretty cool..." (long silence).  One of the students gave me a tour of the campus which was really nice of him.  Overall it was a positive experience and it's motivated me to start practicing my butt off again because ever since I started teaching my practicing has been going down hill.

Crud I gotta go teach a lesson.  Anyway, I kind of don't think I'm going to get accepted there.  But we'll see.  I might not get into either one of my programs, in which case I'm not sure what I'm going to do.  Keep teaching here?  Move to Boise?  Move to Salt Lake?  We'll see.

It's ADVENTURE TIIIIIIIME! My posts are too long.

Truly it has been a weekend of adventure.  Kurt came to Rexburg and stayed at my place Friday night.  It was tons of fun to have an old friend back, especially one who gets really excited about music.  For awhile now the jazz department has been short on assertive jazzers who are serious about learning the art, especially rhythm section guys.  It used to be Ben and Leighton on guitar, Kurt on keys, Nathaniel on whatever he wanted, and several drummers and saxophonists.  Everyone was looking for gigs and organizing jam sessions and experimenting and trying to play tunes that were way too hard, but it's not like that anymore.  So for Kurt to come up from Utah and practice with the Lionel Hampton festival competitors this year (because we have NO jazz pianists) totally made my day.

Last night was the premier of "The Quartet of Super Doom" which was the movie we made a few weeks ago, and Ingrid and I were going to turn it into another date, but she had to bail on me last minute.  So Kurt and I went to the piano at the Manwaring Center on the second floor (where terrible amateur male pianists frequently try to show off for the passers-by) and attempted to show off for the passers-by.  We actually didn't expect many people to go by, but it turns out we were right by some kind of new ticket kiosk (which was broken but apparently word hadn't gotten out yet) and tons of people came by.  Some stayed and listened.  It was really fun to play in public again, especially with someone who's good.

Later we got a big group together and watched our movie on a big screen in one of the lecture halls in the Snow Building with stadium seating.  Kim made a huge bag of popcorn.  The whole thing was amazing.  John's going to put it on YouTube, so I'll post the link as soon as I get it.  Plus it was like old times with all these people that I don't see much anymore, so I was getting in an increasingly slaphappy mood and soon my maturity level literally dropped to that of my high school days.  I was climbing the Snow Building walls, singing, dancing, saying all manner or retarded things, being flirtastic, and when we went to Millhollow I just had to change "$1.89 Chips and drink with purchase of sandwhich or salad" to "$1.89 hips and drink with purchase of sand or lad" just like old times.  The awkward thing was no one else was hyper, which made me the group entertainment for the night.

And then the moment of glory.  This cute girl with some other group at Millhollow said something kind of funny to me in passing, and then we kept making eye contact for some reason.  And then when I "accidently" flicked a piece of ice at their group, she was the only one who saw, and Dave said she was glaring at me.  So I collected everyone's styrofoam bowls and plastic spoons and constructed an elaborate doll with a face that I drew saying "I'm sorry I threw ice."  It was hideous and dripping melted ice cream, and I walked over to her table and gave it to her with my profound apologies.  Later she came up and told me it was the most elaborate thing she'd ever seen and asked me where I got the inspiration.  My mind went blank because I hadn't seen this coming and my ten noisy friends had suddenly gone completely silent to watch the awkwardness unfold, but I said something stupid and she said she'd cherish it forever.  Later I went through all the clever things I should have said but didn't.  Oh well, I'll probably never see her again.

So now I'm in Boulder, Colorado and already having a swell time.  Everyone's been so nice.  I was at the airport trying to figure out the bus situation from Denver to Boulder when I realized that a bus ticket was $12 and I only had $11.70, and you have to pay in cash and it has to be exact change.  So I said something to this old bus driver from this other bus and after he asked how much I had, he said "Don't worry about it, he'll let you on."  But then a few minutes later he came back and gave me 30 cents!  What a saint.  And then I had only just met this CU student girl when she entrusted me with her stuff so she could go do something back in the airport.  And then I met this retired couple on the bus who found out what bus stop I needed to get off at and explained how to get to my hotel, and the lady had worked at CU so she told me how great the school and community are.  And and this other friendly guy jumped into the conversation who had taken a bunch of jazz classes here and was telling me how cool the jazz faculty is.  And my hotel guy was nice and everyone's a hippie and everyone rides their bikes and the weather is only slightly chilly and I bought food at the organic grocery store right in front of my hotel and the jazz building literally looks like an old cathedral and it's a seven minute walk from my room and and and and...  and everything is just great.

So wish me luck.  I audition in 12 and a half hours.  But even if I don't make it in I'm still moving down here.  I found the perfect spot under a footbridge with some other bums.

Mighty Mouse? No. Mighty Mom.

After a conversation I had today with my mom, I have to say that she's amazing for more than just her ability to reabsorb her own bodily fluids.  Few people may recognize that she's also an educational superhero.  A former kindergarten teacher, Mom has been volunteering for a special education reading program for elementary school kids.  That's cool enough, but she's also been unsatisfied with the way the school system tends to give many of these students the shaft.  Many of them are there just because they did bad on some IQ or reading test that they probably weren't even trying on, and then they got thrown into this reading program and lose touch with everyone and keep getting behind.  Nobody, be they the teachers, teachers aids, or principle, is checking up on these students to see if they should actually stay in the program.  Mom says she's the only one who knows the level they are on and recognizes that some of them shouldn't even be there, and she's trying to communicate this to people who have never contacted her to see how these students are doing.  Anyway there are a lot of other little things that are happening that she's not satisfied with, so she's been compiling information for awhile and gathering an army of parents and other people in the system to change things.  She's doing all of this just because it's important to her, and although she says she wouldn't mind getting paid for the work she's putting in, her primary goal is to make sure these kids get the education they deserve.  She did something similar when she quit teaching and decided to write a bunch of letters to a bunch of influential people pointing out how, among several other things, all these new adopted reading programs that are being implemented are just trying to put all kids in the same box, which gives the slow kids and the fast kids the shaft.  They are designed to relieve the teacher of the responsibility of actually catering to their students needs, which means the teacher doesn't actually have to know what he/she is doing.  The program does all the work.  One size fits all.  Lame.

So Mom has been on a personal crusade to change the subpar Madison School District and save the world, which I think is pretty cool for someone who could spend all that free time she has getting her nails done and gossiping with the gals.  She's also been doing home repairs, studying religious and biological theory, and watching the Ken Burns Civil War Documentary.

Mom's rad.

Speaking of which, nobody says it like Mr. T...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo

Detoxifying at Grandma's

Hide and seek.  I think we've played hide and seek like 10 times in grandma's basement which consists of a bedroom and a small closet.  It became like this personal ninja challenge to keep coming up with more hiding spots.  I have fit myself into every conceivable nook and cranny of that basement, and it finally culminated in this, the last hiding spot.  They couldn't find me until I shouted out to help them.  The best is when it's S's turn to hide and she's looking at me and telling me to go upstairs and count while she's already started stuffing herself under the dresser.
Another psychedelic picture.  They weren't that impressed.  Too much patience required.
Rach died laughing when she saw this one.  It's funny how it distorted S's face to make it look like she's raising her eyebrow, especially since her hand is on her cheek like that.
G's rockstar picture.  Rach loved this one too.  His hair was perfect for this.  You can see more on my facebook page if you want.
"Look at the light" I said.  Very cute.

This Morning, 17,000 Feet Above the Upper Midwest

The stars awaken a certain reverence, because though always present, they are inaccessible; but all natural objects make a kindred impression, when the mind is open to their influence... Nature never became a toy to a wise spirit. The flowers, the animals, the mountains, reflected the wisdom of his best hour, as much as they had delighted the simplicity of his childhood.

To speak truly, few adult persons can see nature. Most persons do not see the sun. At least they have a very superficial seeing. The sun illuminates only the eye of the man but shines into the eye and heart of the child. The lover of nature is he whose inward and outward senses are still truly adjusted to each other; who has retained the spirit of infancy even into the era of manhood.

In the woods is perpetual youth.

A man is fed, not that he may be fed, but that he may work.

Excerpts from Nature (1836)
R. W. Emerson

In the words of the great Dave Simon, "Shoot myself in the face."

So my "audish" as we like to say in a snooty voice in the music world was kind of dumb.  Let me rephrase that.  I am kind of dumb.

First of all, I go to audition and see that the guy auditioning me is not the full time sax guy, but rather the "guest lecturer" sax guy (according to the UI website), which means he comes on campus once in a blue moon to help give the program a good name.  The guy auditioning right before me sounds really really really good, and I think he's only a freshman.  Great.  So I go in and he has me play a couple of scales, which I wasn't planning on doing, but whatever.  I play the D diminished scale just fine, but then he asks me to play the Eb melodic minor.  Now that would have been great except that my brain decided that he'd said Eb harmonic minor, which is awkward to finger on the sax.  So not only do I play the wrong scale, but I screw it up too.  At any rate, he doesn't bother to correct me, and I don't realize what I've done until after the audition.  So next, he has me sight read this tune and improvise on it.  So I did that and was feeling pretty good about it when he asks me if I recognized the chord changes I'd just played, and my mind goes totally blank.  I know that I've heard these changes a million times and so in my nervous state I start mixing things up in my head and saying random tune names that aren't even close.  Finally he tells me "Another You."  I'm retarded.  So then he asks me what I want to play for him and that he has backing instrumental recordings to like any song.  "Just Friends" I say.  "Do me a favor and look it up on the list on that wall and tell me what volume it's in."  Now I'm staring blankly at the list and I can't think of where J is in the alphabet because I'm still thinking about how I can't believe I couldn't think of the name of that tune, and I'm making noises "uh... um..." as he waits.  Finally I focus and find the tune, but start panicking a little because it says the recording is in a different key than I've been practicing.  "Oh, well that's one you should know in two keys, at least," he says.  Again, I feel retarded.  But then, "Oh, I don't think I have that one anyway."  Great.  That was the tune I had really high hopes for.  "Do you know any Benny Golsen tunes?"  Uh... no.  "Okay, how about 'Stella?'"  I've been working on that one, so I agree, but I've been practicing it as a ballad and he's only got it at medium-up.  Whatever.  So my stressed brain is starting to check out again now and I start missing the changes that I've played who knows how many times.  Now my brain is on another planet and he wants me to play a final tune.  Well, the audition instructions said I was expected to know "All the Things You Are," so I suggest that one.  He gets this look on his face like "If I hear that song one more time I'm gonna..." and says, "yeah, you could do that... or how about Giant Steps?"  Swell!  I would just love to play that infamously difficult song with the Jamey Aebersold play-a-long which everyone knows takes it even faster than John Coltrane's original recording.  "Um, I don't think I'd be comfortable taking it at that tempo."  "*sigh* Alright... well then I guess let's just do All the Things You Are."  The recording starts with the intro, which I can't remember because I never perform it with the intro, so I just stand there looking dumb and he's looking at me like "what's wrong?"  Luckily it's a pretty short intro, and I come in at the head.  So I get done, and we talk for a few minutes, but I just want to get out as fast as I can, which I do, forgetting my mouthpiece cap of course, which I come back for later and find out he'd chased me down the hall to give it back to me but didn't find me.

In retrospect, it wasn't THAT bad.  It could have been worse.  He had some nice things to say.  I just let my nerves get ahold of me and I got flustered with all of the little things that kept going wrong.  It kind of sounded like I might get accepted, but that I probably shouldn't bet on any financial aid.  I haven't auditioned for anything (besides for Dr. Watkins every semester, which doesn't count) in like 10 years, and never for anything very important.  So I'm hoping that this will help me for my audition at Colorado next weekend.  The good thing is that I'll be backed up by a live rhythm section then, so none of this having to rely on stupid recordings.  It was a learning experience.  It's always good to get your butt kicked now and again to remind me that, oh yeah, this is no game.  I've got work to do.

Sponge Bob? No. Sponge Mom.

So Mom told me the greatest story on Sunday. She said she had all these weird stressful dreams one night last week where she had all these visitors staying the night at the house and she didn't have time to make meals for them or know where to have them sleep. And then Sis. Bessy from the ward was wearing this really sparkly tight red outfit and was getting really mad at Mom for not fulfilling her compassionate service responsibilities. And there were all these other stressful things I can't remember. So Mom woke up in panic mode while Dad was getting ready to leave. She went into the bathroom but found that she just couldn't pee, and it occurred to her that she'd had a lot of salty popcorn the night before that might have sucked her dry. So she was all panicked and flustered and came out just as Dad was about to leave and said, "I had all these stressful dreams and now I can't pee!" To which Dad just stared at her like, "Who are you?"

S. (Not P.S. because Mom absorbed the P.) Today was the first day in a long time that I went to devotional and didn't feel like fleeing from the room the whole time.

Charles Dickens' little-known sequel: Ebenezer Scroovner

I just discovered pumpkin seeds from a famous October night three and a half months ago when Jacqueline and I got in a pumpkin slime fight.  I think that means it's time for out floor's annual cleaning.  I don't know, just a hunch.  But I SWEAR I've cleaned the floor since then.  And I finally threw out the black squash that we were going to turn into bat, but by the time I threw it out it had turned orange.  Is that normal?

Grad school auditions at Illinois are this Saturday and I'm feeling totally unprepared.  At this point it's like I don't even care, just let me play and get it over with.  STRESS.  February has been the longest month of my life when it's supposed to be the shortest month.  It's been one anxiety attack after another, but thanks to good friends, especially my roommate who is never at a loss for insight and acts as if my life is the most important thing to him, I'm starting to feel more stable.

I seem to have been in the business of burning bridges these past few weeks, which is the worst kind of business to be in.  It's caused me to reevaluate my approach to relationships with other people in general.  I think the biggest lesson I've learned is the fact that I need to look for reasons to love other people rather than reasons to distance myself from them, as well as be more proactive in showing that love.  Most of my relationships with other people have been driven by those people.  My friends and family have always called me to do things, but for the most part I've rarely called them.  If I don't get a call, I just hang out alone.  It's just easier not to show love, and I can always look at a person and come up with several reasons why I shouldn't have to.  And after all, why would I voluntarily put myself through all of the stress that comes from human interaction?  Have I just not found enough love for other people that I'm willing to overcome my own discomfort and laziness to reach out to them and show them that they are loved?  Maybe.  And then I look around me and see all these people who learned that lesson so long ago and I get mired in self-pity and loathing and get discouraged to think I'm still just starting.  How did Scrooge change so fast?

Come to think of it, I used to be very loving growing up, but somewhere in my teenage years I started burying it under layers of of pride and disillusionment.  I don't know why.  It's still in there though, and it still surfaces when I'm completely honest with myself and others, which is usually when I go through humbling experiences.  Like right now.  I'd like to think that those of you who know me best can attest to that.

So to any friends and maybe even family I have alienated recently or over the years, I am sorry I tend to be more brain than heart.  I really do love you.  Far far far more than you know.  In fact, at my lowest times, the thought of all of you is very literally the only thing that keeps me going.  So thank you.

Cheese Balls

This last week was nuts.  I spent last weekend playing a 10 hour jazzathon for Justin's Arts West school.  Mostly his students played, but I still got to play quite a bit.  Several of his students were amazing, especially a pianist named Kelin who is already playing at a professional level.  Jeff, the vocal instructor, did most of the emceeing and was hilarious with his jokes and improvised songs.  He had these special introduction songs for his vocalists that included backup singers/dancers that were amazing.  I got to play All the Things You Are with Ryan and Sanden and we did two a cappella choruses that were really great.  Sanden joked that I have a good sound despite the fact that I studied with Watkins.  He likes to tease Watkins.

Hopefully Arts West doesn't go under.  The things they're doing are incredible, but they're having a lot of trouble with their finances and it's taking an obvious tole on Justin and his family.  I would love to go teach for them, but I'm not sure it would last, or I'd get paid, or if they even have a spot for me.  Maybe I could just live with them and be their housekeeper?  They could use the help.

We tried coming back Sunday but had to turn back because of a storm, so we didn't get back until Monday, which set my theory class back a day.  I don't know how I'm going to fit everything in this semester.  Ryan and I talked a lot about the ear training program and how it needs some major overhauling.

We also had a good conversation about how classes need a good balance of "what" information and "why" that information is applicable.  In other words, because information for the sake of information is pointless, the teacher needs to provide at least one view on how to apply that information to your life and why it's important.  If for no other reason, it needs to be pointed out how the information enriches life and makes us grateful by making us more aware of our surroundings and our relationship with them.  However, some teachers (especially at BYU-I) spend too much time philosophizing about their own gospel filtered ideas toward the subject and don't relay enough of the regular information you would expect to get in such a course at any other school.  It's not the responsibility of the teacher to provide a comprehensive approach to how I apply the information, just point out a possible approach.  Ultimately it's the student's responsibility to decide how it should be applied.  We also talked about the ongoing controversial issue of what defines jazz music.  Of course we still didn't find the answer, but we threw out the idea that music is always changing, but we only get a new major style of music when a lot of changes happen at about the same time.  We also talked about how members of the church are misinterpreting the "good, better, best" idea.  We are applying it to situations in which things are not good, better, or best, but just DIFFERENT.  It's possible to have two different approaches to something without one being better than the other.  The good, better, best thing tends to create arrogance and extremism when it's misinterpreted.  We talked about a lot of things that were very enlightening that I can't remember right now.  Hopefully they'll be brought to my remembrance when the time is right.

A couple of weeks ago I got in a slump for several reasons.  I had a friend who didn't have to be my friend at the time give me a late night call and I had one of the most meaningful conversations on the topic of religion that I've ever had.  If you ever read this, thank you J.  This last week I had a great time visiting J at her flower shop.  I respect people that respect the beauty of living things.  That night we were going to watch my new movie Children of Heaven by Majid Majidi which I highly recommend to anyone.  However, in a strange twist of extremely awkward events our plans changed and I was completely thrown for a loop.  The night ended on a somber tone.  It was one of those nights I wish I could rewrite.

Yesterday I was asked to help the Simons and the Ryzkas make a movie that they'd been working on.  I was feeling neutral about it when suddenly I got a text from Dave saying that he'd set me up with Ingrid for that night.  Apparently he'd taken it upon himself to try and cheer me up.  Ingrid and I went to the magical crawl space at my house and got our super villain costumes.  Mine consisted of a foam mask of a Christmas Tree, my Taekwondo sparring vest, and my cyborg therapy glove thing I've had since I broke my finger in high school.  Ingrid wore the rest of the sparring gear (which was black), a makeshift black cape, and a penguin mask, and we called her Penguina.  We also found a bag full of balls of newspaper wrapped in tape.  After Navaho tacos at the Ryskas', we went to the snow building.  In the end there were nine of us total, all wearing the most ridiculous costumes imaginable.  The plot was simple.  Four superheroes with crappy powers get set up by a mysterious faceless man (Kevin) by the name of Cheese Big (or Cheese Red, Cheese Bread, Cheese Whiz, etc., depending on who was saying it).  He sicks his four evil henchmen on them, each of whom has to be summoned.  Ingrid and I get summoned while sitting in adjoining bathroom stalls.  I'm reading the newspaper and she's knitting.  The movie culminates in a huge fight scene in the Barrus Concert Hall.  I had to fight John where I used my Cyborg glove to make him hit himself in the face with his balloon hands and then throw him off the stage.  Then, in the coolest camera shot ever, he kicked the glove off my hand which flew thirty feet and broke in two pieces.  In the end, the heroes are looking for the mysterious man who started it all and are in the middle of saying his name, "Cheese...." when the camera zooms in on Kevin's face and he says "....Balls" in the most menacing/goofy way, and that's the end.  We went over to the Ryskas' to which it today and it was amazing, but John is going to edit it this week, including adding background music. It's going to be the next blockbuster fo' sho'.  I came home utterly exhausted last night, but happy.  Thanks Dave for putting it all together.  You're a pal, even if you are slow and hairy.

To all my friends and family, I'm sorry if I've been a stranger.  I'm trying to figure out my life and I've been guilty of becoming very introverted in the process.  I need to get out of myself.  I love you all.

Shave and a hair cut, six bits. But inflation made it 11 dollars. Plus tip.

Well we left for Utah on Tuesday to hang with the fambly.  We were supposed to have this second Christmas on New Years Eve the next day when the nieces and nephews would open presents from the other side of the family, but Janice and Gabe were still getting over something and Rachel suddenly got sick that night, so it didn't work out.  PLUS Gabe and Sophie decided Wednesday morning to make nests out of all this dried spaghetti and sauce which the dogs then devoured, making a big mess, and then somehow they were able to climb way way up to the top of these shelves and get the WD-40 which they used up spraying down the dogs' hair.  Needless to say, they got in a lot of trouble.  

Sarah and I went cross country skiing at Sundance which was fun even though it was really icy. It turned out they closed at 5:00 PM so we were only out there for like an hour and a quarter, and since we paid about $27 apiece to do it, it was kind of the equivalent of going to a really really expensive movie.  We returned to grandma's to clean up and go party and Sarah assured me we could eat at her brother Bob's house.  Sarah's brother Bob and sister Karin and their families were having this big get-together, so there were kids running all over the place shooting people with Nerf-like guns that seem to be getting more and more lethal.  But as for dinner, it turned out to be chips, crackers, salsa, shrimp, and spring rolls.  Sarah's family is really cool, so we had fun.  We took off to pick up Sarah's friend, took the Trax down town, dropped by a hotel where Kurt was playing piano and Sarah's friend Nate was playing bass, walked forever to drop by a little party thrown by some of Sarah's married friends, started a game of Apples to Apples but left ten minutes into it, were wished a "Happy F****** New Year!" by a guy walking down the street by himself with headphones who was twirling these flashing balls on a string, got to our train two minutes late, waited forever for the next train, spent midnight singing Auld Lang Sing on it, swung by the U of U Institute Dance to go to the bathroom, made fun of the guy sitting by himself playing classical music on the piano to get the ladies' attention, drove to the Arts Center and finished the night dancing to techno music for over an hour with an indie crowd while like half the people there came up to Sarah to say hi to her.  And her last boyfriend was there who hates her and didn't say hi even though we were like ten feet away from him the whole time in this kind of small room.  I stayed the night at Sarah's and we made waffles and watched White Christmas the next morning, which to my utter surprise, I had never seen before.  I just figured I had because I can't count the number of times I've been with a group of people and someone says, "Oh let's watch White Christmas!  It's my favorite!"  Then I got picked up in the afternoon and headed back to the Burg.  Given the fact that my New Years usually suck, this one was actually a lot of fun for the adventure of it all.

Then today, this happened...

You can't see it too well, but I shaved half of my mustache and one side of my face so that I would have this spiral starting at my nose and going around my chin and up to my ear.

I could have been a Mennonite.

El producto final.  Hot damn.